Save the Date: Guilty Pleasures Party II

The rumors and drunken ramblings are true: Our roving reporter of good times and the Yakima Sports Center are throwing another summer bash. Yes, the second annual Guilty Pleasures Party returns for a night of good-natured debauchery.

The date: July 25.

The place: the Yakima Sports Center.

The details: Well, as always, those are still a little fuzzy, but what we can tell you is good-lookin’ singer-songwriter Colin Spring will be back with more musical guilty pleasures (i.e. sweet cover tunes), and headlining is the electric, eclectic indie folk/roots maverick Chuck Prophet.

Of course, we’ll be supplying a whole stack of “Hello My guilty pleasure is” name tags and setting up a photo studio, so remember to wear something snazzy.

Guilty Pleasures is also hoping the Sports Center will be making Jell-O shots again (hint, hint).

The cost: Only your pride and dignity if you miss it. Uhh, we mean $5.

Stay tuned for more information closer to the P-A-R-T-Y.

BEACH N BREWS: GUILTY PLEASURES AND FRIENDS’ GREAT OREGON COAST MICROBREW TOUR

Back in the day, beer was beer was beer.

That was until several years ago when Guilty Pleasures became intimately involved with the beer business. Well, more accurately, intimately involved with someone in the beer biz.

During that time, Guilty Pleasures developed a great appreciation for the craft of brewing. All of a sudden, a beer’s IBUs and the types of hops used became a determining factor in selection. (Of course, Guilty Pleasures can still pound a PBR with the best of them.)

So when Guilty Pleasures and friends recently headed down to Seaside, Ore., our trip took an unexpected turn when so did the weather — seriously, it snowed on the beach. We decided to ditch the sand and look for suds as we embarked on the Great Oregon Coast Microbrew Tour.

It began innocently enough when Guilty Pleasures, cold and tired of wandering the same old boring shops in Cannon Beach, Ore., decided to make a pit stop in Bill’s Tavern.

Turns out, Bill’s isn’t just a bar, it’s a brewhouse with windows above the bar so you see the brewing vats rising up from the middle of the building. Also turns out, Bill’s makes a mighty fine beer.
G.P. RECOMMENDS: The nicely hoppy Duckdive Pale Ale.

Here’s where the brew tour also took us:
• The Pelican Pub in Pacific City, Ore., is pretty proud of it’s beer, as it should be: the ocean-front brewery racks up a ton of beer awards each year. But come on, $6 for a pint? Still, the pub’s view of the waves crashing on Cape Kiwanda is beautiful and well-worth the visit.
G.P. RECOMMENDS: A commemorative surfboard key chain bottle opener.

• Next, we set out to visit the home of Rogue Ales in Newport, Ore. Unfortunately, we made the mistake of only going to the public house on Bay Boulevard where the service was terrible — although the Kobe beef burgers were great. We quickly got our check and crossed the Yaquina Bay Bridge to the actual brewery, a cool old building on the marina where you have to walk between the shiny silver brewing vats to get the pub.
G.P. RECOMMENDS: The brewery tour. It’s daily at 3 p.m. (We got to peek inside one of the walk-in coolers and there were stacks of boxes with the HopUnion logo on them. Guilty Pleasures felt some Yakima pride.)

• Now card-carrying members of the Rogue Nation — there really is a card and it gets you discounts — the next day we visited what is perhaps Guilty Pleasures’ favorite place to enjoy a beer and good pub grub: The Rogue public house in the former Bumble Bee Tuna Cannery on Pier 39 in Astoria, Ore. It just feels like home.
G.P. RECOMMENDS: Since Guilty Pleasures didn’t have to drive this day, it was all about Rogue’s Old Crustacean, a robust, unfiltered barleywine that packs a punch.

Though, the beach ’n’ brew vacation had to come to an end, our quest for the best beer in the Northwest didn’t.

After spending the weekend in the Portland area, we hit BridgePort Brewing and one of the many McMenamins pubs, made a stop at Full Sail in Hood River, Ore., on the way back to Yakima — got the ruben sandwich there, it’s glorious — and capped the whole thing off at home with a 22-oz bottle of Beer Shoppe Anniversary Imperial Indian Pale Ale made by Ellensburg’s Iron Horse Brewery.

When all was said and done, Guilty Pleasures’ mementos from the trip included two brewery hoodies, one growler, two pint glasses, lots of pictures of Haystack Rock and five unbroken sand dollars. Not bad.

• Guilty Pleasures is a weekly look at whatever Guilty Pleasures wants to look at — or drink.

SANTACON 2007 (Portland, Ore.)

So many Santas.

TWO NON-REFUNDABLE TICKETS TO PARADISE: Come see Eddie Money with Guilty Pleasures

Guilty Pleasures and a group of friends are going to see ’80s pop-rock legend (yes, legend) EDDIE MONEY at the Central Washington State Fair tonight.

The concert starts at 7 p.m., but Guilty Pleasures plans to get there around 6ish, you know, to grab a corn dog, check out goat mountain, buy one of those giant photo buttons, etc. Admission to the fair is $10 but the concert is free.

Seriously, Eddie Money, people!

He’s the man who brought us such hits as “Baby Hold On,” “Two Tickets to Paradise,” “Shakin’” and “Take Me Home Tonight.”

Plus, well, let’s just say the years haven’t been good to Mr. Money, and Guilty Pleasures can’t wait to see that in person.

So if you’re interested in joining us, there’s a good chance we’ll be in the BEER GARDEN.

THEN:

NOW:

EVEN GUILTY PLEASURES GETS THE BLUES: A PLAYLIST FOR BREAKING UP

While Guilty Pleasures is crazily excited to see pop-rock great Eddie Money next week at the fair — “Take Me Home Tonight” is a personal favorite — lately, songs on the sadder side have been in rotation on the new iPod. (Yes, Guilty Pleasures has finally joined the 21st century.)
EVEN GUILTY PLEASURES GETS THE BLUES. And although drinking tequila in bed is one of Guilty Pleasures’ preferred ways to drown the failed relationship sorrows, sometimes you just gotta get up, take a shower and blast the stereo.
So here it is, GUILTY PLEASURES’ BREAKUP PLAYLIST with songs that will help you have a good cry, satisfy that urge to get mad and scream, and, when the time is right, get over it.

• “GOOD WOMAN,” Cat Power. (The video is kind of cheesy, but you can hear the song.)
It’s all Guilty Pleasures can do from sobbing uncontrollably when Chan Marsha’s voice cracks as she sings “This is why I am leavin’/And this is why I can’t see ya no more/And this is why I am lying/When I say I don’t love ya no more.”

• “PICTURES OF YOU,” The Cure.
The outcast 9th-grade girl in all of us — or sensitive 9th-grade boy — has a soft-spot for The Cure, and this song has been playing on repeat for weeks.

• “YOUR EYES HAVE CHANGED,” With a Bullet.
Gotta give a shout-out to local boys With a Bullet and this rockin’ tear-jerker.
Listen to it

• “UN-BREAK MY HEART,” Toni Braxton.
Just try and stop the flood gates when this one comes on.

• “JOLENE,” Dolly Parton.
In an earnest, desperate voice, Parton pleads to keep her man in this heart-wrenching song. (The White Stripes’ cover is equally haunting.)

• “DON’T THINK TWICE, IT’S ALL RIGHT,” Bob Dylan.
This simply-strummed folk song has a serious bite, especially when Dylan sings, “I ain’t sayin’ you treated me unkind/You could have done better but I don’t mind/You just kinda wasted my precious time/But don’t think twice, it’s all right.” Ouch.

• “WHAT GOES AROUND … ,” Justin Timberlake.
It’s cathartic to watch JT as he bangs on the piano — which he does in every live version of this song. (Of course, it also just makes you feel good to look at Justin Timberlake.)

• “YOU’RE SO VAIN,” Carly Simon.
One of Guilty Pleasures’ all-time favorites. Just ask anyone who’s been in the car when this comes on the radio.

• “I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU,” Three Days Grace.
Go ahead and scream along to this one. The neighbors will understand.

• “BLACK BEATLES” (Beatles vs. Black-Eyed Peas vs. Ludacris vs. Kelis), Loo & Placido.
In the revenge/rock-out category comes this seamless mash-up from French remixers Loo & Placido, which heavily samples the Beatles’ lesser-known and creepy, yet poppy, song “Run For Your Life,” and Kelis’ angry scream of “I hate you so much right now,” from “Caught Out There.” It’s pure catharsis with a catchy beat.
Listen to it

• “SURVIVOR,” Destiny’s Child.
A great getting-over-it song, especially with these funny but sassy lyrics: “You know I’m not gonna diss you on the Internet/’Cause my momma taught me better than that.”

• “SINCE U BEEN GONE,” Kelly Clarkson.
Yep, you can’t wallow in sadness forever. And that’s why you gotta love Kelly Clarkson. From round-faced “American Idol” winner to svelte pop-rock star, Clarkson pulls no punches in this undeniably great breakup song. Four words Guilty Pleasures never thought would be uttered: “Crank up the Clarkson.”

• Guilty Pleasures is a weekly look at whatever Guilty Pleasures wants to look at.

• GOT MORE FAVORITE BREAKUP SONGS? Comment below.

DRINK UP / GET FREE STUFF (HOPEFULLY)

In honor of reps from the LAGUNITAS BREWING COMPANY — makers of the tasty Lagunitas IPA —making a stop at the Yakima Sports Center tonight, here’s a reposting of Guilty Pleasures’ column about free beer swag. (Not that I know for sure there’ll be free stuff tonight, but I’m sure hoping.)

For Guilty Pleasures, there’s no cheaper thrill than getting high on life — and by high, Guilty Pleasures means 5,700 feet up.

Last weekend, Guilty Pleasures swallowed a deep, deep-seated fear of heights and rode the Silver Mountain Resort gondola — at 3.1 miles, it’s the world’s longest single stage gondola that carries people — up to the Dave Smith Motors Amphitheater atop Kellogg Peak in Idaho.

Most of the ride was spent gazing out at the view, then hyperventilating, then scouring the “Gondola Gazette” for random gondola facts to assure Guilty Pleasures that it was, in fact, safe. (The whole thing was made by a Swiss company, and if the Swiss can’t make a safe gondola, then no one can.)

The high-altitude adventure was for the annual Silver Mountain Brewfest, which this year featured bluesman Curtis Salgado, the man credited with inspiring John Belushi’s interest in the blues and being the genesis for the Blues Brothers.

Yes, beautiful scenery, a smokin’ blues legend and beer. Guilty Pleasures’ head nearly exploded from the fun of it all — and the altitude, of course.

But what really had Guilty Pleasures all giddy and lightheaded was all the free swag. When it comes to free stuff, Guilty Pleasures can spot it a mile away. It doesn’t matter if its a cheesy Frisbee, tote bag, ball point pen or sticky pad with some lame company logo on it, Guilty Pleasures will take it home (and then four months later put it in the pile of stuff to go to Goodwill).

But free stuff at beer festivals — keychain bottle openers, golf tees, bumper stickers, temporary tattoos and more cardboard coasters than you’ll ever need — now those are keepers.

It’s fun stuff. It’s stuff you’ll actually use and put on your car and proudly display for all the world to know that you too enjoy a frosty microbrew …

And most of all, it’s what makes dealing with all that annoying scrip worthwhile.

* Guilty Pleasures is a weekly (most weeks anyway) look at whatever Guilty Pleasures wants to look at.

GUILTY PLEASURES PARTY PICS

Thanks to everyone who turned out for Saturday’s Guilty Pleasures party at the Sports Center. There was drinking, there was dancing, there was me on stage playing air guitar …

I’d say it was a smashing success and it was great to see everyone proudly displaying their own guilty pleasures.

Here are some pictures of the party in case you missed it (or it’s a bit hazy):

The On Magazine swag table.

Chad Bault gets the night going.

Everyone’s favorite good-looking folk singer, Colin Spring, and On Magazine’s Kim Nowacki.

Colin even had a set list which included Blue Oyster Cult’s “Burnin’ For You” and the Gin Blossoms “Hey Jealousy.”

And here are some of your guilty pleasures:

G.P. HEARTS ‘THE SIMPSONS’

Harry Potter-schmodder.

The summer movie that Guilty Pleasures has been eagerly — perhaps obnoxiously — anticipating is “The Simpsons Movie,” which opens nationwide July 27.

Sure, some may say you have a problem if you’re purposely going to certain movies just to see the trailers for this epic film that’s 18 years in the making.

But if you’re like Guilty Pleasures, not a day goes by that you don’t throw out a well-timed “Simpsons” quote —Everything’s coming up Millhouse. You don’t make friends with salad. My cat’s breath smells like cat food. Let’s go crazy, Broadway style.

It’s almost a reflex.

For Homer-heads, all it takes to diffuse a potentially disastrous moment is to dryly utter, “worst (fill in the blank) ever,” a la Comic Book Guy. And you know you’ve found a kindred spirit if he or she, like Guilty Pleasures, thinks KIMA’s Stu Seibel looks and sounds an awful lot like Mr. Burns.

It was this animated Fox TV show that managed to break Guilty Pleasures’ long-standing ban on fast food when Burger King was handing out “Simpsons” Halloween toys in the kids meals. And in a brilliant marketing campaign, Guilty Pleasures is now making daily trips to 7-Eleven just because the Slurpee cups say Squishee and there’s KrustyO’s and Buzz Cola on the shelves. (Sadly, there was no Duff Beer to be found.)

Why the obsession? Why the piles of VHS tapes full of old episodes? Why the “Simpsons” chess set when Guilty Pleasures doesn’t even really know how to play chess? Why is “Do you like ‘The Simpsons’?” a first-date question where the answer could ultimately be a deal-breaker?

Because the show is so smart and funny and self-deprecating. It’s a cultural barometer that critiques American life while at the same time cracking blue-collar jokes.

One of Guilty Pleasures’ favorite episodes is when Lisa joins the environmental group Dirt First, which is looking for someone to camp out with in an endangered tree. The group’s leader, Jesse, says, “Once you’re up there, you can’t come down. Not for a Phish concert, not even for Burning Man.” (See the video clip below.)

Sure, references to Burning Man are now a daily occurrence, but this episode first aired in 2000.

At its core, though, “The Simpsons” is very much a sweet and sincere show about family. Yeah, Homer may hire a private investigator to learn more about Lisa’s interests, but he does it out of a real desire to get to know his daughter.

Which is why Guilty Pleasures is so excited about this movie — as well as worried that it won’t live up to all the hype and high expectations.

But if those trailers are any indication, this could be the BEST movie (based on a TV show), ever.

Whoo-hoo!

* Guilty Pleasures is a weekly look at whatever Guilty Pleasures wants to look at.
** And above is what Gulilty Pleasures would look like as a Simpson. You can create your own avatar here.

[kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/pTUt6A4mdE8" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]

On a Wingman and a Prayer

Cheesy beer commercials aside, there is something to be said for having a good WINGMAN.

You know, that buddy who’s there to help you meet a potential mate — either short or long term. (The term’s origin is credited to the film “Top Gun,” but more recently it’s popped up in such sitcoms as “How I Met Your Mother,” which Guilty Pleasures loves.)

These days, wingman is a fairly gender-neutral term. Guilty Pleasures has both male and female friends who are great wingmen.

What makes a great wingman? A lot of things.

First of all, a good wingman is selfless and not embarrassed to look like a fool in an attempt to make you look cool. But at the same time, he or she must be suave and charming enough to reel in the target, and then sly enough to hand him or her off to you without being obvious.

Of course, sometimes being obvious about a set-up works well, too.

A good wingman knows when to use each tactic.

It also helps if your wingman is attractive, but not too attractive, and in a relationship. That way there’s no competition.

And a dedicated wingman will go out with you to a bar — even though he or she is tired — because the person you have your eye on may possibly be there.

Recently, Guilty Pleasures has been navigating the treacherous dating world in Yakima and occasionally will radio for help from a wingman.

However, a wingman can only do so much. Once you’re flying solo, it’s all up to you to land the mission.

And, generally, this is where Guilty Pleasures crashes and burns.

* Guilty Pleasures is a weekly look at whatever Guilty Pleasures wants to look at.

[kml_flashembed movie="http://www.youtube.com/v/UEVa2swtC10" width="425" height="350" wmode="transparent" /]

ODE TO SUMMER

Thursday was the summer solstice. It’s the longest day of the year — which means today begins the slow decline into the bleak days of winter.

But there’s still six months until the winter solstice, and at least three more months of fun in the sun. So let’s celebrate.

Here it is, Guilty Pleasures’ Ode to Summer:

• There’s nothing better than cruising around (in a fuel-efficient car) with the windows down and the warm wind on your face — Guilty Pleasures hates car air conditioning — while rocking out to some sweet jams. Here’s what’s currently on rotation on the car stereo:

— Wolf Parade, “Apologies to the Queen Mary.”

— Arcade Fire, “Neon Bible.”

— Willie Nelson, “Willie and Family Live.”

— Modest Mouse, “We Were Dead Before the Ship Even Sank.”

— Amy Winehouse, “Back to Black.”

— Jane’s Addiction, “Nothing’s Shocking.” (It’s a summer classic that Guilty Pleasures busts out each year.)

• Backyard barbecues are what summer’s all about. They don’t have to be anything fancy. In fact, they shouldn’t. Impromptu, see, is a key word in hosting these shindigs — all you’ve got to do is light up a couple of tiki torches, pull out the cheap plastic lawn chairs, dump some ice and beer in a cooler, fire up the grill and throw on whatever you can find in the freezer.

• Chow down on some fresh veggies from one of the many residential fruit stands. Guilty Pleasures has a penchant for corn on the cob.

• Of course, there are times when you don’t feel like cooking. And Guilty Pleasures has discovered the simple joy of sitting outside on the Yakima Sports Center’s Yakima Avenue patio while sipping mojitos and gabbing about the day.

• Speaking of sweet summer sips — while growing up, a sure-fire signal that summer had arrived was when Guilty Pleasures’ mom would place a big glass jar full of water and tea bags out on the patio to make sun tea. Recommended tea: Market Spice Tea, which originated in Seattle’s Pike Place Market.

• Summer also isn’t complete without a trip to the Gorge Amphitheatre. And this summer there are plenty of good shows to pick from: Willie Nelson’s Fourth of July Picnic, Warped Tour and the Download Festival are on Guilty Pleasure’s to-do list.

But, you also don’t have to break the bank to enjoy outdoor shows. From 6:30-8 p.m. Thursdays (July 12-Aug. 23) is the Summer Sunset Concert Series in Franklin Park. These shows are free.

• And finally, there’s always something to be said about friends with swimming pools.
(Guilty Pleasures is a weekly look at whatever Guilty Pleasures wants to look at.)

Hot Tamale

In food-related news, time is running out to get perhaps one of the season’s tastiest treats: Asparagus and cheese tamales from Los Hernandez, 3706 Main St. in Union Gap.
Just under $20 per dozen, these lovingly-made tamales are guaranteed to win you friends at parties. But save some for yourself because they are also the perfect way to soak up that strange mix of liquors sloshing around in your stomach the morning after said party.

xo.
Guilty Pleasures

SKATE OR DIE

Between the ages of about 8 and 12, Guilty Pleasures spent an inordinate amount of time going as fast as a tween’s legs could possibly go around and around in circles at the local roller skating rink.

Birthday parties, elementary school trips, all-night skate (7 p.m.-7 a.m., only did it once), Guilty Pleasures loved roller skating, but for the most part, forgot it was even still around until a friend’s birthday at Skateland a couple months ago.

Sure, Guilty Pleasures was reluctant to go at first. Would roller skating be like riding a bicycle?

Or would it be a complete disaster?

After a more than 15-year hiatus, can you lace up some skates — most likely, equally as old — and pick up where you left off?

Not entirely.

But it wasn’t as bad as imagined either. And now Guilty Pleasures is part of a crew (ranging in age from mid-20s to post-30s) that heads to the rink most every Wednesday evening to get a skating fix for a mere $5.25.

Just like the bruises, all the things that you loved as a kid come back in an instant: the feel of the wind on your face as you go faster and faster, the sound of skates on slicked-up wooden floors, the wonderfully cheesy music, that instant rush of relief each time you catch yourself from falling.

Skateland is a throwback to all of that. It probably hasn’t changed much in the past 15 years (although one has to wonder when the glow sticks and blinky lights were added to the gift counter). It’s got the linoleum snack area, the worn-thin carpet, those weird, round benches, the smell of sweat mixed with pre-teen angst, the disco ball, the Hokey-Pokey (and now the Macarena). There’s thunder skate and speed skate and games to win a free hot dog or the notorious Pickle Fizz.

It brings you back to being 12 years old — which also includes prepubescent anxieties and insecurities like when it’s time for couples’ skate. Sweaty palms don’t go away with age.

Yeah, there really are times when you rediscover something so innocently good and fun, you can’t believe you ever forgot it existed.

Of course, now, this innocent activity is followed by something else Guilty Pleasures finds to be fun and good — a post-skating cold one at a local bar.

• Skateland Fun Center is at 2506 Old Town Road in Union Gap. For times, cost and the dress code — which is much more strict than Guilty Pleasures’ trashy childhood rink — call 575-6442.

• Guilty Pleasures is a weekly look at whatever Guilty Pleasures wants to look at.

Fun in the Sun and Wind at Sasquatch!

Well, The Gorge Amphitheatre did it again. It proved that Pacific Northwesterners are tough as nails when it comes to watching great bands in adverse weather conditions.

Day One of last weekend’s Sasquatch! Music Festival was a scorcher, and Guilty Pleasures made the mistake of wearing pants and a black long sleeve shirt, which made for much perspiring, repeated applications of sunblock — and still getting burned — multiple trips to the misting thing-a-ma-bob and the reluctant purchase of several $10 Coors Lights. (Can those be expensed?)

On Day Two, Guilty Pleasures, outfitted in a much more sun-appropriate outfit, ended up shivering under a blanket as wild winds rocked The Gorge, causing a three-hour delay on the main stage and a reshuffling of acts.

Still, nothing could detour this intrepid reporter of rock from the chance to see everyone from The Black Angels to Björk.

Here are some of the highlights (and a couple of lowlights) from the festival:

• Ozomatli’s high-energy, bilingual set of lowrider funk-rock mixed with salsa, hip-hop, reggae and jazz. It really heated up the afternoon.

• Neko Case. She was the only reason Guilty Pleasures went to Sasquatch! last year, when the alt-country siren got hailed out. This year, decked out in adorable plaid shorts, the Tacoma native delivered a beautiful set of her deliciously twangy tunes. (Unfortunately, on Sunday The Polyphonic Spree, whom Guilty Pleasures very much wanted to see, bore the brunt of Mother Nature’s wrath this year and were forced off the stage mid-set.)

• Oh, Canada! The festival was packed with Canadians, and no wonder. They’ve got to be proud of the Arcade Fire. The Montreal ensemble played a mid-afternoon set a couple years ago that made an instant fan of Guilty Pleasures, who was then gushing with excitement during Saturday evening’s electrifying performance. (And as Régine Chassagne switched from accordion to drums to keyboards, she had The News Tribune pop music critic gushing to Guilty Pleasures about a newfound crush on her. Join the club.)

• It was fun watching a bolo-tied Mark Pickerel, The Long Winters’ John Roderick and a host of other musicians emerge from backstage and join the rest of the fans eagerly awaiting Björk to take the stage.

And when she did, it was like some kind of strange and wonderful sci-fi concert — complete with lasers — where the Icelandic pixie commanded the stage while singing, then in a tiny little voice would utter a sincere “Schank you.”

• It’s also super fun to people-watch at The Gorge. Guilty Pleasures’ favorite T-shirt: “I dig chicks who recycle.”

• Due to the crazy wind that shut down the main stage, Austin, Texas’ The Black Angels got a lot bigger audience on the Wookie Stage than they might have otherwise, and that’s a good thing. The band’s performance was like a warm blanket of heavy, droning psychedelic rock that rolled over the crowd bunkered down in the grass.

• The Dandy Warhols were nothing special, but — and Guilty Pleasures isn’t trying to take credit for this — they did play the “Veronica Mars” theme song and it was everything Guilty Pleasures hoped it would be.

• In ninth grade, Guilty Pleasures first fell in love with the Beastie Boys. And that ninth-grade fan came flooding back as the New York boys performed a mix of their hits and their instrumental works (which they also performed the day before on the Wookie Stage).

They capped off the night with “Sabotage,” which had the entire crowd jumping up and down — and this time it wasn’t just to stay warm.

• Guilty Pleasures is a weekly look at whatever Guilty Pleasures wants to look at.